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What If Your Young Adult Isn’t Stuck—Just Still Learning?

There’s a moment many parents dread—but few talk about. Their child graduates high school… or college… and then?

Nothing.

No momentum.

No next step.

No launch.


Instead of taking off, they stall. They move back home. They stay up all night and sleep all day. They avoid conversations about work, school, or what comes next. They might seem anxious, aimless, or even angry.

And if you’re the parent watching this happen, it’s easy to go straight to guilt.

What did I do wrong?

Should I have pushed harder?

Backed off more?

Done… something?

Let me stop you right there.

What if your young adult’s struggle isn’t a moral failure or a parenting failure—but a skill gap?

Because that’s what I see over and over again: Bright, capable, big-hearted kids who simply never learned the practical and emotional skills they need to thrive as adults.

We spend 18 years teaching our kids how to pass algebra, write essays, and take tests. But how many of them leave home knowing how to:

  • Create and follow a weekly schedule?

  • Make decisions without spiraling into panic?

  • Break big goals into tiny steps?

  • Make a phone call to a stranger?

  • Keep trying when something feels uncomfortable but not impossible?

These aren't “extras.” They’re essentials.

And they’re not intuitive for everyone—especially in a world where executive function demands are higher than ever, and the path to adulthood is increasingly complex.

The good news?

Skills can be taught.

Growth can happen—at any age, in any season. The launch can still come, even if it’s later than you expected.

But it won’t come from shame, blame, or panic. It starts with recognizing that this isn’t about laziness or rebellion. It’s about readiness. And readiness is something we can build.

So if you’re parenting a young adult who seems stuck, don’t write the ending yet. This isn’t the end. It’s just a pause—until the right tools come along.

 
 
 

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